oopsies: on freelancing and birthday greetings

oops! my previous post was supposed to be an update and then I realized I wasn’t able to publish the other post so it wasnt really an update. ahahaha. anyway, here’s the post that was supposed to go before the updates post:

Definitely needed a break ASAP. Feeling the panic of recession, I have basically foregone sleeping the past few days. Currently freelancing as a transcriptionist (with no certainty of getting paid) I have spent hours after hours just trying to complete the files with bouts of asthma and allergic rhinitis on the side.

A week ago I was actually thinking of foregoing this leave but after the past couple of days, I was in dire need of sleep. Still thinking if all this freelancing gig is worth it though, maybe I’d be better off part-timing or something (at least there’s lesser risk of not getting paid). I don’t know. Will just have to wait and see if this pays off. sigh.

–
haven’t had the time to create special posts for my birthday greetings. huhuhuhu. but anyway,

MAUI (FEB.5)
TIN (FEB.9)
TOSCA (FEB.11)
REENA (FEB.13)

HAPPY, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

MAUI: we super, super miss you. come back to Manila, now na. hehehe. saw a Terrano the other day and I remembered you. waaah. Uwi naman kayo ni Rach dito, kahit bakasyon lang. hehehe. tawag ka naman sa office, si Rach lahat inaaway eh. ahahahaha. =) (love you Rach, hehehehe.)

TIN: you know naman I’m always here for you (TINY bubbles and HUGE expectations including. ahahahahaha) thanks for always being there for me and always remember, kampi tayo lagi kesehodang kalokohan man yan or may wicked witch tayong aawayin. now on to more important stuff: ano, i-project na natin si you-know-who? wehehe. sabihin mo lang, pahunting natin si girl. hehehe. loves yah! *hugz*

TOSCA: babygirl tush, super super thanks for everything. I really appreciate yung excitement mo pag nagkwekwento ako about the wedding preps, really. it means a lot to me. we miss you na sobra. hi to Gelo. =) ingat lagi ha. loves yah tush. =)

REENA: we’ve been friends for such a long time and I really am glad na all through these years, we’ve managed to keep the friendship going. we met when we were like 12 or 13? that’s like 10 years ago! grabe. =) i miss the letters and the books and the DBP Workshops (kahit na my drawings looked like a 5-year-old could have done a better job while yours looked like they were made by a famous artist and worth like a million trillion bucks. ahahaha.) thanks for the years of friendship and memories. hope to see you soon. =) ingat lagi. =)

--
I am a witness to the suffering of my people.
I am a chronicler of truth and a catalyst of change.

-The Scholastican-

freelance updates

as of 7:30 AM, I got paid already! I was actually getting anxious cause I haven't heard from my client for the past two days and yes I did give him a piece of my mind. hahaha. After a few minutes, I got the payment already and another project for this week. whew. love it! here's the proof from PayPal:

I know it really isnt that big but I really worked hard for it and I am mighty proud of me. hahaha. Freelancing is definitely hard and risky but once you get paid, it's all worth it. =) For freelancing jobs try and visit GetAFReelancer (everything from Data Entry to Transcription to Captcha Work can be found here. You just have to be patient and vigilant as it is risky):

giving it up to get it back

While randomly reading posts on the Wedding Bee, I came across one about "giving it up to get it back.." here's the part that got to me:

" Except, of course, that — leaving aside the details and nuances — I think that's why we didn't last. I wasn't willing to give any of "me" up in exchange for "us." Here's my theory: you have to be willing to give up some of "you" (actually, the thing about you that you most tightly grasp) in order for a relationship to work. "

Being an only child, I was brought up to be strongly independent. As much as possible, I do things on my own and I avoid asking people for help or for favors. I like the fact that I don't really depend on anybody but myself. Then came James.

We met when I was just about to go to college. I was a brat (still am, hahaha.) and when we first got together I had all these rules that he had to strictly follow. One, I pay for my own fare. Two, I pay for my own meals. Three, I don't like the idea of him escorting me back home everytime we'd go out. I would make him leave me at the terminal insisting that I can go home on my own. All that and more.

I remember my dad asked me about it and kept on rambling about how the guy was supposed to do that, how it was the norm, how it was a guy's way to show his respect, yadah yadah yadah. I only had one answer for him: "Marunong ako umuwi mag-isa. Di ko kailangan ng taga hatid. " or I'd say: "May pera naman ako, di ko kailangan magpalibre." I was that proud. Blame it to my stubborn youth.

I did notice a bit of hurt in James' eyes everytime I'd insist on my rules. I knew he wanted to take care of me, but I did not allow him to. Maybe I was afraid to be vulnerable, afraid to trust, afraid to let go. Back then I didn't realize that it wasn't a matter of who's paying for who or who's fetching who. It was a practice of compromise. It was a matter of "giving up a part of me in exchange for us."

Now I realize that I insisted on those rules not because I was this independent, modern girl, but because I was just scared to be transparent. I was too scared to trust. It took me months to finally be able to give up control and that's when I realized that this was way deeper than a childhood crush or a puppy love. It was more than a fling or a normally shortlived first love. This was a guy that I could trust my life with. With him I felt safe and that nobody can ever harm me.

Two years back when we were taking a break from us, I asked him: " are you angry with him?" (him, referring to you all know who). Without blinking, he said "yes." I said: "why?", expecting that he'd say because he took you away from me or something like that. But he said: "sinaktan ka kasi niya at nakikita ko ngayon kung gano ka nahihirapan. galit ako kasi nasasaktan ka." yes, that's how he takes care of me.

...and that's exactly what I got in exchange for "giving up" a part of me.

--
I am a witness to the suffering of my people.
I am a chronicler of truth and a catalyst of change.

-The Scholastican-

dress diaries : Christos Bridal

I sooo love these gowns! (but still love mine a tad bit more. hahaha.) They're all from Christos Bridal. love love love 'em! =)

love the simplicity of this one. stunning.

love the straps. sort of a princessy type of gown.

conservative yet stylish.

the embroidery is very Filipino.

the ladies of our entourage will have designs similar to this.

now this made my heart stop for a while and actually made me have secondthoughts about my gown.

love the modern feel of this gown.

more fabulous gowns to come.. =)


--
I am a witness to the suffering of my people.
I am a chronicler of truth and a catalyst of change.

-The Scholastican-

my favorite loveteam

definitely long overdue. these pics were taken days before my birthday pa. pero I think this post is just in time for Tin's birthday and Valentine's Day na rin. hehehehe. =) "my favorite loveteam" of all time.. wehehehe.. =)

pero wala paring tatalo sa pinakafavorite kong pic nila.. hihihihihi.. =) :